Lonely, but not alone

As evidenced by previous posts, I'm prone to being a victim of my moods. This morning something snapped, heading into church no less. I found that no matter how I tried, I could not pay attention to the readings. My consciousness drifted in and out of the sermon. Like a child, I drew pictures of wildflowers on the bulletin. Here I was, surrounded by people who really do care about me, escorted by a most loving spouse, yet in the mist of all this, the intensity of my loneliness was like a weight on my heart. While I recognized the emotion, the feeling of isolation, the reaction of withdrawal; it's something I was unable to shake. Perhaps it will wane in slumber. Perhaps it won't last. But how? Why? I'm tired; I'm torn. It's with me still.

The Path

In front of you, in front of me, never easy
So apparent, still deceptive, so we go
Sometimes blindly, often frightened, but together
Even as one of us lags behind

And when I need to walk alone
Don't take it as a slight
It's just the way I'll always be

Walking slowly, running madly, catching breath
Hold my hand, push away, meet again
See the sunrise, sweat the midday, watch the sunset
And drink in the moon along the path